You are my first baby and so I know sometimes things are hard as we grow up together, you as a human, me as a mother. But I think you're surviving and beginning to thrive which is all I ask for.
You are my independent individual. While you care what other people think you rarely let that influence a decision that you make. You have always been my child with orange pants and a neon pink shirt and mismatched socks. And you loved it. Right now you have purple hair which I love more than the green before it (pictures to be posted later) and are learning to tame your makeup usage to a dull roar instead of an intense scream. I appreciate this. You wear all black even though none of your friends do and listen to music by bands whose names are weird, even to most weird people.
You're sense of humor is certainly developed and you have moved far past the fart jokes of old and are onto dry sarcasm. I know you get this from me and often we have some really fun times in the car where the sarcasm is free to roam. I adore this about you and can't help but imagine that this is certainly helping you get through these fun teenage years.
You still are one of the smartest kids in your class as evidenced by your yearly testing that we received last month. Advanced in Writing and proficient but within 10 points of advance in Reading and Math. You seem to skate through school with little effort which is a little worrisome for me but then, I was similar and so can relate.
For the first time ever you have more friends than our living room can hold and I was so pleased to come home and find 13 teenagers hanging out last Saturday for your birthday party. There were days not too long ago where we had to troll the neighborhood on the day of your party searching for kids to come and see the magician or I had to invite my friends kids to make the party seem less empty when only 1 or 2 friends would show up. This year I don't think we had enough sitting space and while 13 kids hanging out, eating pizza, watching bad horror movies and throwing M&M's around my living doesn't sound like heaven I'm sure for you it was your best birthday ever. I'm so glad to see your peers growing into you (finally) and you are blossoming socially.
People often view teenagers as selfish and I wont lie, you certainly have your moments where that rings true but that's because people don't see the you that I see. They don't see the daughter that holds my hand in the car when no one is looking. They don't see the child who asks if I can help her keep her anxiety in check. No one knows the teenager who went shopping with her mom for baby clothes before anyone even knew there was another baby on the way. Or the girl who wants to be there for the birth of her youngest sibling. Or who walked her mother down the aisle and signed the marriage certificate. The girl that puts her mothers shoes on can not be all selfish.
We are starting to talk about college and career choices in earnest now. You don't seem to know every much about college other than that you want to attend the University of Arizona in Tucson but you are pretty sure that you want to be into some kind of art. You've talked about being a tattoo artist but are smart enough to discuss the crummy economy and how that might not be profitable in the long run. You've talked about maybe business so you could run your own and I think that is truly where you will end up. Doing something creative on your own. You aren't my worker bee child or my rule follower, you are dancing to the beat of your own drummer. I'm sure your career choice will follow along that path as well.
You're recognition of world events is remarkable to me and you have a firm grasp of history not only of our own country but of the world. You also seem to lean more to the left than the right politically and I wont lie, that makes me smile. When you compared the plight of our POW's to the plight of those in Gitmo to your possibly someday step mother I was pretty impressed, not only that you could see the similarities but that you were brave enough to point it out to an adult. Standing up for yourself and your moral's and values is always a good thing. Always. Your sense of justice amazes me and I'm continually impressed by it.
Happy Birthday my little Kylito. I hope this next year is even better than the last. And no, you may not get your belly button pierced.
Love,
Mom
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